


Struggling To Breathe

by xxxbookaholic



Series: One Breath In, One Breath Out [1]
Category: A3! (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, Character Study, Dialogue Heavy, Emotional Hurt, Emotions, Gen, How Do I Tag, Kind of a drabble, mentions of bullying, no beta we die like men, tenma is just trying to help, yuki rurikawa is bad at emotions
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-04
Updated: 2020-08-04
Packaged: 2021-03-05 21:13:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 853
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25701892
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xxxbookaholic/pseuds/xxxbookaholic
Summary: Sometimes, Yuki forgets how to breathe.
Relationships: Rurikawa Yuki & Sumeragi Tenma
Series: One Breath In, One Breath Out [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1864003
Kudos: 33





	Struggling To Breathe

**Author's Note:**

> i'm in the midst of writing my yuki-centric fic so i decided to write this drabble just for fun (although it's not a very fun fic). i'm considering writing a sequel and maybe even a third one, so i'll add this to a series in case of that. please enjoy!

The night after passing out flyers for _Water Me_ was oddly quiet. It wasn’t like Tenma was particularly loud; far from it. Despite Yuki’s complaints, the shitty actor wasn’t a _horrible_ roommate. Still, though, there was usually some kind of insult or pushy comment, so when nothing came but quiet filled with tension, Yuki stiffened. _Whatever problems he’s having better not involve me._

Eventually, though, Tenma broke the silence. “Maybe you aren’t so bad.”

Yuki’s head snapped up from where he had been scanning his math homework, over to where Tenma was supposed to be reading over their script. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“It means,” Tenma scratched his cheek, “maybe my assumptions about you aren’t completely true.”

“What led you to that conclusion?” Yuki hummed, spinning back around in his chair to focus on the textbook once more.

“I saw what happened when you and Muku were passing out flyers.”

Yuki paused what he was doing. “Oh,” he said, barely above a whisper.

Tenma was quiet for an uncomfortably long amount of time before he asked, “how long have you been dealing with that?”

“A few years,” Yuki answered, trying to stay nonchalant. Talking about his feelings wasn’t something he did often; there had never been anyone to talk about it with, growing up. His parents were busy with housework and their jobs, his sisters were constantly stressing over school and part-time jobs, and his peers were the problem.

“That,” Tenma paused, Yuki grimaced, and the shitty actor repeated, “That sucks.”

Yuki laughed humorlessly. “Yeah. It does. But it is what it is; I don’t care what they think of me.”

He thought that he had ended the conversation with that statement, seeing as the room went back to a comfortable silence, but then Tenma said, “aren’t you?”

Yuki froze. Usually, when he said that he didn’t mind, people let it go. They didn’t argue. Then again, most people didn’t bring up his tormenters at all.

He shifted for a moment and then turned around again; algebra long forgotten. “Obviously. If I cared about what my bullies thought of me, I wouldn’t go around wearing this, now would I?” He said more than asked, gesturing to the dress that he was wearing and then to the skirts hung up in their shared closet.

Tenma shuffled his feet together and then said, “are you doing it for yourself or for them?”

“What?”

“Are you pushing yourself,” when he said this, he pointed towards all of the long lists of clothing commissions, college pamphlets that really weren’t necessary at his age, and the giant stacks of studying material, “so much for yourself, or to prove them wrong?”

Yuki stood up abruptly. That was enough. If Tenma was going to act like he’d just lost at least fifteen braincells, he would have to do it alone. Before he could reach for the doorknob, though, the shitty actor grabbed his wrist and tugged. His throat was closing up, it felt like there was a fire forcing its way up his body, and _Yuki couldn’t breathe._

“I’m asking you as your roommate, not as your troupe leader.”

“You’re being crazy, crappy actor. Of course, I’m working for myself! I have big goals and a few schoolyard bullies have nothing to do with it.” He sounded desperate, even to his own ears, but he couldn’t help it. He just wanted to leave, to get out. He just wanted to be alone.

“Are you lying?”

“No! God, Sumeragi, leave me alone!” Yuki didn’t pay any mind to the fact that he referred to his roommate by something other than an insult; the tension in their room was too dense for him to even notice.

Tenma eyed him skeptically for a moment but eventually let go. Yuki took the opportunity to grab his phone, open the door and exit. He didn’t even stop to slam the door; just kept walking until he found the (luckily) empty living room.

That was one of the bad things about sharing a room; he could never catch a second to be alone.

Yuki sat down on the couch and didn’t cry. He just cuddled up under a stray blanket and stared at the blank TV. Silence was how he was used to dealing with his issues; quiet was familiar, and familiar was good.

Eventually, he drifted off. Not quite asleep, but not quite conscious either. It was a state somewhere in between.

That was how he spent the rest of the night, and the night after that, and the night after that. He slept in the living room until he could learn how to breathe properly and then he went back to staying in his dorm, as per usual. The tension was gone, at least on his side of things, and any comments about his ‘ignorance’ from Tenma were brushed off.

He could run away from his feelings forever, if he had to. Eventually, though, after every part of his body, heart, and mind was numb to the words and the shoving, he always asked himself one question.

_What was he even running from?_

**Author's Note:**

> i hope you enjoyed! if you did, please leave kudos or add a comment! have a nice rest of your day/night!


End file.
